I realized something today in starting Philippians. Talking about joy makes me uncomfortable. I think maybe this is something God has been gearing me up to deal with for a while. It's this thing that I want, and I feel like I have sometimes, but to truly pursue it scares me. Sometimes I feel like its almost easier to accept a life without it.
How do you not stay focused on your circumstances? How do you not let people and situations pull you way down or up? How do you not get disappointed when you are not where you want to be in your life?
I read in Walking with God by John Eldredge a few months ago: "Joy is such a tender thing. I think we resent it. We avoid it, because it feels too vulnerable to allow ourselves to admit the joy we long for but do not have."
I know two things for sure. Joy is something God wants me to have. And joy is something the devil does not want me to have. But I have decided something. I am going to rededicate myself to finding joy, and finding it in Christ alone. I think it is worth pursuing.
"Until now you have not asked for anything in my name. Ask and you will receive, and your joy will be complete." -John 16:24
Sidenote: This post does not mean I am terribly unhappy. I'm not at all. I just know there is something to it when Paul can be sitting in a prison cell and say "I rejoice". I know that's not by his own effort. And its something I want to tap into.
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Shari, I love this post. It's so true, joy feels like this elusive thing that when we experience it at times, it's almost surprising, and we tend to question the source of it. And maybe God during that time is thinking, "it's me, that joy you're feeling. live in it."
ReplyDeleteI love the simplicity of John 16:24. It's incredibly straight forward, so we should have full confidence in asking God for things, given that our hearts are aligned w/ his.
awesome post! :)